Who said dat?

“[He] called me a ‘rapist’ and a ‘recluse.’ I’m not a recluse.”

"I normally don't do interviews with women unless I fornicate with them. So you shouldn't talk anymore... Unless you want to, you know."

Don't cheat.....

Quelle surprise!

A study reveals that women are more grumpy than men when they wake up in the morning. Yeah, it's not like in the movies, is it?

Maybe they have better dreams than we do, so they're ummmm..... disappointed at returning to reality. No matter - men, do yourselves a favour and do NOT attempt any kind of critical negotiations during this delicate time.

Run!

This woman takes a big risk and plays chicken with a 150km/h train in India. Population control has many faces.

[impressed look] Oooo! It's got curves!

Presenting the new packaging planned for Microsoft Windows Vista and Office 2007.

Designed to be user-friendly, the new packaging is a small, hard, plastic container that’s designed to protect the software inside for life-long use. It provides a convenient and attractive place for you to permanently store both discs and documentation.

Obviously, the designer knows little about Microsoft. Everyone knows there's no such thing as 'documentation' coming with a Microsoft product. They didn't mention anything about the built-in Linux detector, that shrieks every time it detects a Linux install CD nearby.

Am I the only one thinking Apple's gonna one-up these guys and build a lava lamp or something into their next packaged product?

Dog-goblins

More pets dressed up.

It's pretty hard to trust a photo anymore

Here's a movie clip showing photo retouching in action (sped up).

I loves me some beets....

Here's an experiment you can try, to better understand your digestive system:

• Eat a lot of beets....... (throw in some carrots for good measure)
• Wait............. (how long depends on the ummmm....... waste products you plan to observe in the next step)
• Watch what comes out.
  

Try not to be too alarmed at the colour.

Attack! Attack! When you don't agree - attack!

You may have heard about Rush Limbaugh accusing Michael J Fox of 'acting' in an effort to promote stem cell research. I enjoyed his response in an interview with Katie Couric. Best come-back: "where were these people 20 years ago when in-vitro fertilization started?"

If this dog had a lightsaber, you'd be dead

More examples of pet owners giving their pets an excuse to kill them in the middle of the night - the Petsmart Howl-o-Ween online pet photo contest. Seen is Arf Vader.

My Top 5 Fave Sandwiches

1. Tuna salad (has to have little bits of green onion)
2. Peanut butter and raspberry jam (no jelly please)
3. Montreal Smoked Meat on rye
4. Egg salad (ditto to the green onion bit)
5. Pulled roast turkey with mayo (with maybe a hint of black pepper)

Honorable mention: Traditional club (turkey, bacon, tomato, cheese, lettuce)

Note: Lettuce appears only on the Club. Keep yer salad fixin's off my sandwich!

Great blog names

Funniest (I mean that in a nice way) blog name discovered in the last while:

Regina Monologues. If you can't figure out why, it's OK. But it rhymes with a famous play.

How does your neighbourhood compare?

This is an American resource only, but it was cool enough to post about anyway. Neighboroo is a site that maps the demographics of an area using the Google Maps API. I decided to try it out on a neat place I visited a few times - Thousand Oaks, CA. The median age is 36. The average household income is $101,000. The median Home price is $881,000. They voted 51% Republican. They have an average 32 minute commute to work one way, with about 0% using mass transit.

It's coming.... mwah ha ha ha!

We got our first snow today. Right on cue, tens of thousands of people have suddenly and inexplicably forgotten how to drive....

(winter's coming)

And for what?

Hopefully you remembered to change your clocks last night (if Daylight Savings applies to you). I find this measure meaningless and detrimental. All it does for me is make it light out earlier in the morning (but not early enough to matter) and plunge my world into darkness earlier in the evening. To enjoy this questionable benefit, I must seek out and adjust every (non-computer controlled) clock, watch and other time piece in my home and try to sync them all up to the correct new time - twice in one year!

I would rather scrap Daylight Savings altogether. I'd prefer it got light later in the morning to reap a few extra moments of daylight on my drive home from work. Thanks to DST, I get to go to and from work in darkness........... YAY!!!

Update: As Jon ever so kindly pointed out, DST actually just 'ended', so I've placed my blame on the wrong culprit. Regular time BAD!! DST good! Nah, it just doesn't sound the same, does it?

Why did the chicken cross the road?

....... to get to the Starbucks, silly.....

I'm obviously not the only person who has discovered that Starbucks have no qualms with putting outlets right across the street from each other. Launi Skinner, senior vice president in charge of Starbucks' store development said, "Going to the other side of the street can be a barrier".

From boingboing.

Canadian music trivia from my friend Ernest

Remember the Canadian group "The Box" ? (indeed I do.... they are from my homestead of Montreal and were among my fave bands of the 80's) Well, they're saved for posterity in the Veoh world. This is their video for 'Closer Together'. Astute viewers will recognize Sass Jordan as the shorter blonde of the two blondes standing back to back.

Enjoy...

E!

It's like...... nothing you could imagine

I ran across this stunning collection of pictures from Burning Man 2006. For those of you who have no idea what I'm talking about, Burning Man is an 8 day long festival held in Black Rock City Nevada, ending at the end of the Labour Day weekend. We're talking the middle of nowhere, desert-style. I won't bother to try and tell you what it's about, you'll just have to read the data at the links and look at the pictures. But it looks.......... delectable. I really gotta get down to that thing one of these years. I hope someone makes a decent documentary about the event. Wikipedia has a pretty good rundown on the event, including a timeline. But seriously, go look at the picture collection....

The pictures are copyrighted. This pic by lush.i.ous

Karl's tips on life - driving

Defensive driving is all about anticipating the worst from every road scenario and being ready for it.

I cannot begin to tell you how important defensive driving is to me. I have lost count of the number of times I have avoided an accident - avoided a potentially fatal situation because of my defensive driving training. I can thank the military for that (they gave me the training for free).

Photo by Lawrence Whittemore.

This is how big it is....

SizeEasy lets you compare the size of something (you'll need to know the dimensions to use this) to other common items for comparison views. The interface allows you to choose various (limited) items - more than one if you like, and change view angle. It's not perfect, but it has potential.

I created a comparison view of my new 8GB hard drive against a credit card.

Now this is reality....... what a find

There's no way of knowing if all of the material being submitted to True Wife Confessions is real (does it matter?), so let's just assume it is. If you want to get some insight into what women have on their minds, then you should read that blog. If you ever thought, even for a second, that women are not complex emotional beings..... read that blog. There's some serious stuff going on there. It's not all bad either.

Photo by cherryvega.

Batteries not included

Have you seen the Ikea 'tidy up' commercials? Ikea sure put together some awesomely funny ads. My fave is the one with the kid playing with the......... oh I can't spoil the surprise...... All 3 of them will likely be available to you if you follow the first link.

It's colour-riffic! Chroma-tastic! Eye-xciting!

If you haven't had the chance, you might want to watch the new Sony Bravia ad. It's the one where they rigged an apartment complex to explode coloured paint - kinda like the water fountain display in front of the Bellagio in Vegas. It's............... nice. Is it effective use of advertising? I'm still trying to decide.

You know Sony..... if you put all the money you spend on advertising into subsidizing your product to make it more affordable....... I would suggest that you could make more money, because you'd be selling more stuff. We all know you make great gear, the problem is - we can't afford it!

My thoughts on current politics

I've become disheartened over the direction politics has gone in North America (I can't speak for anywhere else). It seems that the ideals of many political parties and the people who represent them have become so weak, that they can no longer make a good argument just standing by their principles. Instead, almost every day we hear attacks on the opposing parties (usually the one that threatens most) and the people who represent them. It's one thing to illustrate why your platform is a better idea than opposing ones, but it's another to get personal and suggest that any other platform isn't patriotic, or moral. Politicians need to remember that there is no such thing as one set of values for everyone. Countries are made of people from every walk of life and every belief system. I value a politician who argues less about whether the laws of the land reflect their personal value system and focuses more on what needs to be done to make our world a better place to live. Not just for the well to do in our society, but for those who have yet to find their way.

It is why I believe in environmental responsibility, social equality and health and welfare for all. None of the ruling parties in North America have shown that they share this belief. Too bad....

My name is Karl and I approve this post.

"Sir, did your injury affect your ability to reason?"

I've really gotta start taking my camera with me wherever I go, so you all don't think I'm making this stuff up.

I actually saw a guy today wearing one of those head braces that holds your head straight. You know - the kind that doesn't let you turn your head in any direction?

So, what's the big deal, you ask? He was driving.

Because it's the elderly you really gotta watch for

In Florida, they've decided to insist on drug tests for the library volunteers, whose average age is 60-85. Read more about this crazy story here.

This is my best complaint for the week

If you're a Habs fan living in Calgary, you're likely going through withdrawal symptoms right now. It's bad enough (but understandable) that you won't get to see any Canadiens hockey games on English CBC on HNIC, unless they're playing Toronto. But you're probably wondering why you can't even find the broadcast in French on the CBC station from Edmonton (CBXFT - channel 11). I was wondering too, so I wrote them and asked what's up. They used to have an agreement with RDS (another French broadcaster from Quebec) to simulcast the Montreal games on Saturdays, but that agreement ran out this summer. RDS chose not to renew that agreement, leaving countless Habs fans out in the cold. Luckily, Shaw TV makes it possible to subscribe to RDS "a-la-carte" for $2.50 a month. The good news is that RDS happens to carry every Habs game - not just the Saturday games.

If you can't beat 'em............ buy 'em

Is this even possible?

The guy who writes Dilbert lost his voice a while back. Read this article and then tell me if you think this is bizarre. Is this for real?

Mockumentary my eye.........

Have you caught this new character Borat yet? The idea is that he's an emissary from Kazakhstan who's trying to learn American culture "for make benefit glorious nation of Kazakhstan". He's just another invention of Sacha Baron Cohen (Ali G). This is the new Team America for 2006 - crass, politically incorrect and potentially thigh-slapping hilarious. What I find most incredible is how many folks fall for his character (they think it's real). The movie should be out next week. If you've never seen this guy's antics yet, just visit YouTube and search for Borat. Just make sure you swallow any liquids before you watch anything. Not safe for......... ah you know the drill.

Now even foxier........

I probably shouldn't have to tell you, but............ Firefox 2 is out now.

From the special part of the pumpkin patch...

It's a burger............ no, it's a pumpkin........... no, it's a bumpkin!

Found at bits&pieces.

I'm amazed he knows where the on/off switch is

I couldn't wait to post this one.

Bush does "the Google"!

Pssst! Dubya....... that there program you can't remember the name of...... it's called Google Maps.

"My head felt just like 2 balloons..."

I came down with a wicked flu-type illness today, so it was seriously a great deal of work just to get this little post online. I may be back tomorrow, but more than likely it will be Thursday.

In...... out.... repeat (no it's not a sex manual)

Great 3D animation of an engine - for those who are curious about how they work. It starts with the general assembly of the parts, then once it's together, the animation switches to showing you how the parts train works together. It shows how the gas / air mixture comes in, gets compressed, ignites, then is exhausted. You'd be exhausted too...........

Kids who were unmotivated to do something else...

A list of the world's oldest family companies. Makes great reading. Note that the oldest family company in North America is #32 on the list. I found that surprising. I thought it would have been lower.

The picture has nothing to do with the list. I just threw that in there....

Pic by etolane.

If you're over 40, you have a song in your head now.....

A site devoted to rubber bands. There's really nothing more that needs saying.........

It'll suck to be Joe's Pizza....

Best line from the internets explaining what the point of net neutrality is - or in this case, why the
folks against neutrality (against equal internet access for everyone) need to be challenged:

"...it would be like calling Joe's Pizza and having the phone company tell you that since Joe hadn't paid for "guaranteed connections" to you, that you'd have to wait three minutes before they'd put the call though (but you can talk to a Domino's operator right now if you'd like!)" Craig Newmark

"...and then they steal all our internets"

Jack Black does a marvelous sendup of an Anti-piracy PSA. In other words, he's not serious.

Don't be a douche........

We don't need no stinking downspout!

I found a couple of galleries of really bad home renovation / repair jobs. The one pictured here is my all-time favourite from the bunch. Gallery One. Gallery Two.

Interview with Cory of Menaredumb.ca

A few weeks ago, I met Cory Dirks, who is going to write a book about dating. More specifically, a book for men, about women. I asked Cory if I could mention his project on my blog and spoke to him on the phone the other day:

Me: Cory, could you please explain what men are dumb is all about in your own words?

Cory: Trying to help men have a better understanding of women. What women would like to see in a potential mate. Dating in particular - it's about dating etiquette.

Me: What motivated you to start this project?

Cory: Personally, I didn't really have much of a clue when it came to dating. I got married and divorced early. My mother had bought me a book for Christmas with quotes from married women about relationships and that gave me the idea to write a book about dating.

Me: So the site menaredumb.ca is hosting a survey where you hope to collect as much insight from as many women as possible, the end result that these results could make it into your book.

Cory: Yeah, I'm looking for colourful answers to make the book more interesting. I'm finding that women are as interested in reading the results in the book as I hope men will be. They want to know where they stand.

Me: What would you say to women afraid to put their name to the answers?

Cory: The name isn't as important to me as the age and career (to create a demographic). Women can use an alias. I believe my survey will show there is a difference (in opinions) between women in certain age groups.

Me: How would someone contribute a story that's not covered in the questions?

Cory: I wasn't asking for true stories at first. But at the end of the survey, there's a question "have I missed anything". That's where I've been getting a lot of really good straight from-the-hip information. I'm not getting the juicy or fun stories I was hoping for. But it's still been a lot of fun so far.

Me: When are you hoping to have enough information collected to get started on the book.

Cory: Tentatively, I'm looking at February. That's still up in the air. I'm going to see how many completed surveys I've got. I think some ladies when they look at the survey don't take it seriously. I feel the site's been misrepresented elsewhere. They made it sound like it's a place to find an easy way to pick up women - but that's not what we're about. This is about helping men be able to present themselves in a manner that women will find them compelling.

Cory and I agreed that this survey is open to all women, married or single. Please take the time to check it out and share your perspective about dating.

John Roberts... aka JD Roberts

Hey America....... you know your beloved John Roberts, from the CBS Evening News? Betcha didn't know he's from Canada. Betcha didn't know he got his (recognizable to all Canadians) start as a VJ on Much Music (Canada's superior version of MTV). Back then he was known as JD Roberts.

Want me to prove it to you? (the clip is actually from his work while he was still with Toronto's CITY-TV - whose company spawned Much Music)

Cats are funny

Sometimes cats are too playful for their own good. I have to admit though, I'd be getting a good laugh out of this feline's obsession with the printer paper......

Ben, you're a bad monkey

Am I the only one who never saw the interview Ben Affleck gave Anne-Marie Losique from Montreal back in 2004? You know, the one where he's (supposedly) drunk and conducts the interview with Anne-marie sitting on his lap? In which he can't keep his hands off of her? Oh..... you haven't seen it either? Well, we need to rectify that situation.....

Machinima festival

You may recall me mentioning machinima before. It's where people use video games to create movies. Now there are so many of these unique works of art that there is a festival where entries compete. I've only ever seen Red vs Blue and Strangerhood to date, so I was looking forward to seeing some other works. The first I tried was The Adventures of Bill and John. It's French, but there are English subtitles. It's a hoot. Better Life seems like a music video created using the Second Life experience. The Days After uses the game Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas to create a short about a deadly virus epidemic.

This machinima thing is only waiting on some high level talent to turn it into a cultural phenomenon.

One more thing to distract you from driving

We are a car society. So you knew it was only a matter of time before someone found a way to hook people up while driving. Flirtingintraffic operates on the premise that if someone is interested in you, they look up your ID on the site and send you a message. You can either buy a sticker or download a pdf file that you'd have to print out and somehow affix to your vehicle. No word on whether this is available outside the US. The gay and lesbian ID stickers are rainbow coloured......

FWIW, my answer was 'no' to 'parents' bed...

100 teens were asked questions about their 'purity'. Then 100 parents (not theirs) were asked what their teens would have answered to the questions. The results are revealing - both in how the teens answered, but especially in how the parents thought their teens would answer. Talk about a generation gap. Kids today........

Let's give a poll a try - spanking (your kids)

It's smart, but is it too intrusive?

In Japan, they put advertising everywhere...... even on the handrails of escalators. More advertising goodness from Japan here.

(Geez... again with the Star Wars crap.....)

I found a site with really bad Star Wars costumes.

Hey miss........ Jedis don't wear pink... sorry. Hey Boba Fett.............. you're lookin' kinda......... ummm.............. nice breastplate!

For those moments when you're bored... or at work

I usually don't have much time for those online flash games, but this one is kinda fun (my opinion). It's called Swords and Sandals and the point is to build a gladiator character and fight other gladiators, moving up to fighting the big dudes. A good time waster.

I predict a huge traffic jam here Oct 31.....

An aircraft mechanic in training decided that building a mock airplane crash at the front of his home would make for a splendid Halloween display. The problem is, it looks so real that a lot of people got freaked by it, including the cops. But I guess that's the point, isn't it? I wonder what eerie effects the crash sight will have on the night it's supposed to have its impact? Will the wreckage be burning? Will he hire his friends and family to pretend to escape the fallen craft... screaming with terror.... ? Geez, I need to book a flight to LA for Halloween..... this could be a good show.

I'm trying not to make fun....

Have you ever wondered what the deal is on the Jedis? Wonder no more - there is an actual religion now based on the Jedi. No.......... really. The web site is The Jediism Way.

The Jedi need to learn to use a proof reader............ or The Force.

Blast from the past - shampoo to blame

Digging into the blog archives, I found this gem about why shampoo is to blame for hot water bills.

They're certainly not American

Here's a list of British words that are mostly unfamiliar to North Americans.

Photo by StarrGazr.

Brilliant!

Ricky Gervais (the creator and a star of the British series The Office) does a funny standup routine on Creationism.