But will it work after I drool all over it?

Oh my....... I must have this videocam. It has a 30GB hard drive inside, good for 440 minutes of HQ video, or 20 hours of LP. No tapes! No DVD discs! Droooooool!

Riddle me this...

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

They wouldn't dare look in here......

I have found possibly the most disgusting (to some people), yet at the same time, the most hilarious gift money can buy. I'm not even going to spoil the fun by posting a picture. Take a brief pause and just go and see this thing for yourself - but you have been warned. Anyone passing by your cubicle is likely to skid to a stop. Who comes up with this shit (no pun intended)? Ingenious.

Thieving bastards!

The Alphabet Song (published in 1835) and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star (published in 1806) have the same tune. I guess it was just too hard to make up something original. In fact, if you take it even further, Twinkle stole the tune from the French poem "Ah! vous dirai-je, Maman" from 1761.

My question is - how come the copyright fanatics aren't all over this? Hmmm? To think - this is the stuff we teach our kids. No wonder they grow up believing it's alright to steal music........

Let's crank it down a few notches....

If a toaster has settings from 0-10, it's been my experience that anything higher than 3 or 4 cremates the toast into a specimen of carbon dust. Why is that? Have toaster manufacturers been calibrating their toasters based on some mysterious mutant heat-resistant bread? I just don't get it. On the 9 or 10 setting, even a bagel would be so much poppy-ash after a ride in the toaster.

The truth hurts

Powered by a frickin' laser beam!

Imagine a plane powered by a frickin' [making quotes in air with hands] laser beam. No.......... really, it's powered by shining a laser beam on it.

Karl - car critic

I wanted to blog someday about my car without showing off. But then I figured, maybe other Internetians are considering the car and my writeup could cement their decision. Alas:

The Acura TSX. Made in Japan, it is really a Honda Accord in disguise. The North American Accord is different - the TSX is what the Accord looks like in Europe and Asia. Acura badged it and threw in almost every option under the sun to transform it into an entry-level luxury sedan. It's not cheap, but I justified the cost when I compared it to a fully loaded Accord which came in just a bit less. It's better looking than the Accord. It only has a 4 cylinder, but once again, Honda magically squeezes out an incredible amount of power (200HP). Compared to my last Accord, which only had 125HP, it's a huge step up. Amazingly though, this car gets roughly the same mileage as my last car. In my mind, this car represents the perfect balance between performance and fuel economy.

Luxury abounds in this little package, with leather, HID headlights, 17" alloy wheels, heated seats and an instrument cluster with crisp lighting. The 5 speed auto with sport shift is a lot of fun. I found myself using sport shift a lot on winter roads. The car seems narrower and the trunk is a bit smaller, but the car has a tight, ready-for-slalom feel to it that allows me to drive at speeds Darlene just doesn't approve of. Speaking of which, the VSA helps reign you in when things are getting out of control. This car is almost idiot-proof. It has air bags all over the place, including the side pillars.

Bottom line - if you want a practical car that's fun to drive and a little luxurious to boot - TSX is the solution.

Discover greatness

Truly great photography is an art I've always appreciated. Unfortunately, many artists exist that would ordinarily wallow in obscurity. The Internet changed all that - now anyone can post their masterpieces for all to see. That doesn't mean every picture is going to touch you in some way, but the opportunity is there. Flickr is one place to discover talent, but nothing screams "you'll find treasure here!" like a good ol' online photography competition. Like this one, for example. Browse the photos for a relaxing distraction.

Forget cold fusion......

".....a project [that] will one day revolutionize energy production. The novel approach is based on two common but previously unexploited natural laws. One is a well-known form of Murphy’s Law which states that when toast is dropped, it always lands buttered side down. The other law states that when a cat falls, it always lands on its feet. These two laws are set in opposition to each other by attaching a buttered piece of toast to a cat’s back, buttered side up. If the cat is then suspended in the air, the two laws cause the cat to perpetually rotate. By building a device to hold the cat and capture this rotating energy, enough force is harnessed to drive an electric generator."

Love........... hate............ it's all the same really

I've built up t-shirt momentum......

This imaginative design says "Hate" looking straight on, but looks like "Love" in a mirror. Is that cool or what?

Kudos to BoingBoing for the find.

For the person who needs something..........

Did anyone actually buy these? These moving lips synchronize with your phone or online chat conversations. Wouldn't the entertainment value of this item wear off after 2.39 seconds? Oh......... wait........ I get it. The real entertainment value comes from showing these off to friends and watching their faces as they scramble for something polite to say...... nice.

Size certainly is everything

Rumour has it this could be a glimpse of the next generation of Laptops. Designed by Fujitsu, it's the size of a CD, and folds out to reveal a keyboard.

Mmmm...............pi

This is also available as a t-shirt from the place linked to in the preceding post.

Conversation starter fashion

I like a nice tee with a witty saying just as much as the next guy. Start with 'most recent' designs and go from there.

Exercise... good. Lack of pain..... better

My philosophy on exercise is quite clear:

No pain........................ good! I don't like pain.

Life cereal..... introduced the year I was born...

You don't have to look very hard to find timelines about wars, the progression of science, or the story of Hollywood, but how about the timeline on food?

For example, Tiramisu has only been around since 1968 or so, while garlic's been around since 3000BC.

Best I could come up with in 5 minutes......

Honey.............. where does it plug in?

This is priceless. People are buying what they think are flat panel TV sets (off the back of a truck no doubt) for several hundred dollars only to get the box home and unwrap.................. an oven door.

That explains why it only gets the cooking channel............................

What are leek frites?

While in Fredericton NB, our crew stumbled upon Brewbakers restaurant. I had the Top Sirloin Wood-Fired Brick Oven Pizza. Yummy. Crust so thin - I don't know how they did it. For anyone travelling there, I highly recommend it. The food is great, the staff are friendly and the ambience is perfect.

The title refers to something one of our crew asked the server in a query about the pizza ingredients.

Poking fun at corporate culture

Conventional wisdom says that when you discover you are riding a dead horse, the best strategy is to dismount and walk. However, we often try other strategies with dead horses, including the following:

1. Buy a stronger whip.
2. Change riders.
3. Say things like, "This is the way we have always have ridden this horse."
4. Appoint a committee to study the horse.
5. Arrange to visit other sites to see how they ride dead horses.
6. Rewrite the standards for dead horse performance.
7. Appoint a tiger team to revive the dead horse.
8. Create a training session to increase riding ability.
9. Compare the state of dead horses in today's environment.
10. Change the requirements, declaring that, "This horse is not dead."
11. Hire contractors to ride the dead horse.
12. Harness several dead horses together to increase speed and pulling power.
13. Declare that, "No horse is too dead to beat."
14. Provide additional incentive funding to increase the horse's performance.
15. Do a Commercial Activities Study to see if contractors can ride it cheaper.
16. Purchase a software product to make dead horses run faster.
17. Declare the horse is "better, faster, and cheaper" dead.
18. Form a quality circle to find uses for dead horses.
19. Revisit the performance requirements for horses.
20. Say this horse was procured with cost as an independent variable.
21. Promote the dead horse to a supervisory position.
22. Shorten the track.
23. Establish benchmarks for industry dead-horse leaders.
24. Put together a spiffy PowerPoint presentation to get planners to double the dead-horse R&D budget.
25 Get the horse a website.
26. Declare that the horse is not in fact dead, but poised for growth.
27. Sell off its ears to reduce overheads.
28. Re-organize the horse to make it more customer-facing, by cutting off its head and sewing it on backwards.
29. Declare that since the horse is dead, we must now ride smarter, not harder.
30. Sell off the horse's legs one by one, until someone will buy the smaller horse.
31. Declare that riding is not a core competency.

Thanks Ernest.........

Vee-Dub in da haus!

I suppose it's possible that your enjoyment of something potentially increases when someone you know really likes it. This is the case with the 3 VW 'un-pimp ze auto' commercials that I get a kick out of. They can be found here.

Joyeuses Paques

For the 5 people who haven't seen this yet................

Psst.....it should say 'Tolerance'

Do they know they're about to become food?

I was in Fredericton New Brunswick this week, doin' the road thing for work. Yesterday, we were in a fish 'n chip place and I'm taking in my surroundings. Beside me, there's a huge fountain / pool thingy, filled with fish. The fish are (it seems to us) staring up out of the water at us. Out of nowhere, I say, "I wonder if the fish freak out when they smell vinegar?"

The playoffs are coming! The playoffs are coming!

Thanks Jeff....

I wonder...... who's stealing from who?

If the RIAA can sue people who 'steal' from their profits by sharing music on the Internet, I wonder if I could sue the RIAA for false advertising and 'stealing' from me. After all, I own several thousand dollars worth of (bought and paid for) CDs and I sure don't feel like I got my money's worth. Those Clay Aiken CDs alone are really weirding me out..............

Meanwhile, the RIAA seems to think if you can't pay their settlement offer, you should just drop out of school and get a damned job! Ummmm, Department of Justice? Helloooo.....?

You are hurt! No, It's just a flesh wound...

We luvya Dubya

"We support the election process, we support democracy, but that doesn't mean we have to support governments that get elected as a result of democracy."

George W Bush on the sanctity of democratic election results. Washington, D.C. Mar. 29, 2006

Go on......... make fun of us.........

I wonder what the people at Chevrolet were thinking when they created this web site that allows contestants to create their own ad for the new Tahoe. Did they not realize that lampooning would abound? Check it out for yourself, but start with the sixth ad, it's the best IMHO.

You can make your own if you want.........