Monday, March 14, 2005

Things Canadians can do that Americans cannot

  • Sing songs about Kraft Dinner (Americans only know it as Kraft Macaroni and Cheese)
  • Get regular airplay for a band called the Barenaked Ladies
  • Vacation in Cuba (legally)
  • Get drunk on fewer beers (can you say 5% alcohol by volume?)
  • Eliminate deficits
  • Get free health care
  • Advance the cause of legalizing marijuana (we're almost there...)
  • Get by with a military numbering fewer than 75,000 members
  • Understand what 'zed' means (as opposed to 'zee')
  • Elect a liberal government - often!
  • Keep the peace (Canadians are reknowned peacekeepers)
  • Export most of their talent
  • Eat Alberta beef (and we love it too)
  • Not pay tax on lottery winnings - Boo Yah!
  • Free hostages (remember Iran?)
  • Marry gays and lesbians
  • Pay $1.08 for a litre of gasoline (that's over $4 a gallon)
  • Travel the world unnoticed
  • Enter a school without passing through metal detectors
  • Subsist on donuts (Tim Horton's thank you very much)
  • Order 'french' fries
  • Have trouble finding a passenger train to travel somewhere
  • Fend off grizzly bears (Troy Hurtubise - remember the suit?)
  • Build a shopping mall with more working submarines than its own navy (West Edmonton)
  • Rig the olympic hockey games with a hidden Loonie coin at center ice
  • Expect snow in May
  • Come up with a couple of guys like Bob and Doug McKenzie - eh?

OK - some of these are generalizations and some are even outright untrue, but Feel free to add to the list via comments. Posted by Hello

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