What the market will bear

Overheard at an Oil Company Executives' meeting a few weeks ago:

Exec A: Oil prices are the lowest they've been in many months.
Exec B: And gasoline prices have dropped to match.
Exec C: The situation is grim. Our profits are evaporating.
Exec A: We need a crisis. Is the US planning to attack Iran?
Exec C: Nope.
Exec A: What are we going to do?
Exec D: I have an idea.
Exec B: Let's hear it.
Exec D: Let's tell public that one of our refineries experienced a fire, putting it out of commission.
Exec A: Go on.....
Exec D: The resulting sudden shortage in supply will require a dramatic rise in gasoline prices.
Exec C: How dramatic?
Exec D: I'm thinking an increase of at least 15 cents per litre.
Exec B: It's got potential. But wouldn't that only enable us to increase prices in one part of the country?
Exec C: Not necessarily. We could spin this into a nationwide supply versus demand story.
Exec D: We could even add to the crisis by instructing some of our gasoline retailers to pretend like they ran out of gas.
Exec A (chuckling): Can we do that?
Exec C: Sure we can.
Exec B: I'll have my marketing people draft an announcement asking the public not to horde gas.
Exec A (laughing quite boisterously): Oh my goodness, that'll add insult to injury.
Exec D: It's the perfect scam.
Exec C: Indeed it is. I'm amazed we haven't thought of this before.
Exec D: Are we still on for dinner out tomorrow night?
Exec B: I think we deserve it now.
Exec A: Can I catch a ride with one of you guys? I can't afford to fuel up my SUV anymore....
All: [burst into uncontrollable laughter]