Gift idea for him...

Is the man in your life getting Windows XP this year for Christmas? Will he be in need of some training on said operating system? Then show him how much you love him by getting him Bikini Classroom for Windows XP.

Humma hummma!

Give the gift of trivia

If anyone out there has the RPM edition of the Trivial Pursuit game (music trivia), I will gladly accept it as a donation to the "Karl Needs More Music Trivia" fund. As president of said fund, I can assure you that it will go to good use. I don't even need the board or pie pieces, just the question cards....

NHL fan petition

The site www.fansfightback.com is asking fans of NHL hockey to sign an online petition geared to demand a return to the bargaining table. If you really like the game, I urge you to give it a look.

Oooo! That's gotta hurt...

It's almost that time of year again. Photo coutesy of extremepumpkins.com

Will as shrub

Sometimes I like Will Ferrell's stuff, sometimes I don't. But this skit he does on George W is spot on folks. (requires Quicktime)

Down with pennies!

There's some dead weight in my pocket and it has a name - pennies! I've had enough of them. They are practically worthless, yet I always seem to have more than my fair share of them. It's time to abolish these carry-overs from the cyprium age once and for all. Unfortunately, thanks to the GST, the solution requires a re-working of how things are priced. So here goes:

Build the GST back into the price of all goods and services and round everything off to the nearest nickel. That way, something advertised as $1.05 is actually $1.05! What a concept, eh? It would be too easy for software to determine what sales qualify for stripping the GST for forwarding to the government.

So, in summary - scrap the penny, build in the GST, have a nice day.

Regional curiosities

Having lived in different parts of Canada, I've come to realize that there are terms or traditions that are unique to each part of the country. For example:

Montreal (I think) - "mat night" (the night before Halloween)
Ontario - "chip truck" (roadside truck selling french fries and stuff)
Prairies - "prairie oysters" (bull testicles - yes, seriously)

Anyone have any other examples they've come across?

Stop the madness...

Citing a lack of scientific evidence to support low-carbohydrate diet claims, Health Canada plans to ban food and drink labels that tout low carbohydrates. "There was -- and still is -- no reason from a nutrient point of view to be concerned with the amount of carbs that we eat," Health Canada spokeswoman Carole Saindon said.

It was just a matter of time...

My henglish his not so good, eh?

So it occurs to me - while I was in Montreal a few weeks ago, I noticed something. As I found myself surrounded by Francophones and Anglophones, I caught myself starting to speak English with a kind of accent as if French was my first language, just like Francophones do. It was subtle - I didn't start adding 'h's where they didn't belong or removing them where they did belong, but the accent was definately there. Once I noticed myself doing it, I also noticed that other Anglophones did the same thing when they were in the company of Francophones and speaking English. I don't know about you, but I found that very odd.

Google does it again

Another addition to Google labs: local.google.ca

If you're looking for a business, you have got to try this. Enter the type of business you are looking for and the area. It will give you the name, address, phone number, and website of the businesses in the area you are searching, along with a map and directions!

It needs a little work, but so far, the results are promising.

Scrabble = religion?

Do you love scrabble? Well, even if you don't check out Craziest.

Bike lock with 2 keys for sale...

Too bad the person selling this lock (on E-Bay) didn't actually use a Kryptonite lock in the picture.

"Or you could call me Ahmed Al-Dude"

Hey! Saddam could play "The Dude" in the sequel to "the Big Lebowski"!

Gbrowser?

Rumour has it that Google is developing a Mozilla-based web browser. I say "Bring it on".

Safeway torture

There's this song they play on the Safeway sound system. I have no idea what it's called , but I suspect it's "Rollin'" or something, because the guy in the song keeps saying it over and over again. You'd recognize it if you heard it - it's got whistling and sax in it and a guy that's trying (and failing miserably) to sound like Elvis.

Anyway, I must have RFID tags buried in my clothes, because like clockwork, almost every time I walk into a Safeway store, that freaking song starts to play. It happended yet again today and Darlene and I just look at each other and start cracking up. Of course, nobody in the store has any clue why we're laughing, so we look like a bunch of lunatics.

What valet?

So I bring my car into the dealership for routine maintenance today. They're under construction - major renos, and as a result the normal service entrance is blocked. So you bring your car to the front of the dealership and a valet takes it from there. So I go to the service desk and say, "I just dropped my car off with the valet". He's like, "What valet?"

(pause for effect)

We both have a good laugh. Ahhhh good times......

LET ME TAKE YOU!!!

Is that new Acura RSX Type S commercial on TV cool or what?

No longer a temp

So I've recently moved from the ranks of temporary-fulltime employee to permanent-fulltime employee at my work. The very next pay period, I get 2 pay statements, indicating I'm getting an extra week's pay. This was a mystery to me, but it turns out permanent employees don't have a week's pay held back anymore, so the company plays catch-up. I happened to mention it to my colleagues and one of them grinned and offered, "Excellent..........you got your damage deposit back!"

20 ways to calm down your noisy neighbours

A great way to get back at those noisy neighbors! Give them a taste of their own medicine with any one of these 20 ear-splitting sound effect tracks. Anyone who's ever lived in an apartment will really appreciate this hilarious CD.

Make music out of city beats

A Break In The Road is a beautiful animation where you roam a virtual city in search for beats and melodies you like.

After you've recorded six sounds, try mixing them into a tune.

"No flying!"

Have you seen the clips American Express made with Jerry Seinfeld and Superman? Check out "Uniform" and "Hindsight'.

Best.Screen.Capture.Ever

Wow.

Bling for your 2 wheeled thing

It may be superfluous for a car, but for a bike, this Down Low Glow is kinda cool.

You got a license for that thing?

The makers of the new Mini Cooper invite you to obliterate a web site. 'Tis fun.

Awww.....muffin!

Because that's what you are to me......a muffin with feet.

Wanna buy a watch?

Darlene's watch gave out and so it was time for a visit to the local Hudson's Bay Company, who have a very nice selection of watches by the way. On a side note, if HBC is experiencing any financial problems, I know of 2 reasons why. The first reason is that they don't have a lot of staff efficiently placed around the store. So while we had made our selection of which watches we wanted to look at - it took a good 10 minutes to get the attention of a staff member to help us out. In that time, I saw at least 3 sets of customers leave without buying anything. The second reason will become clear in a moment.

So this girl finally comes over to the display case where Darlene has picked some contenders for her new watch. After a few minutes of desperate searching, the sales-girl looks at us and asks, "Have either of you seen the keys to this display case?". Talk about leaving a door wide open (figuratively speaking).

"Seen them? Heck I've already waltzed down to the key shop and had copies made of them..."

I mean....come on!

Aaaack!! My hand!

This optical illusion is definately one of the best out there. Do yourself a favour though, don't try this one under the influence...

Unexpected windfall

So I guess our beloved premier Ralph Klein wants to know what we want him to do with the surplus money available once the Alberta debt is paid off this year. A survey was supposed to be mailed out to most households. I don't know about you, but I did not get mine. You can still participate in the survey online.

Can you say "Time shares in Turks and Caicos"?

Nobody would steal your pizza...

Tired of people stealing your laptop? Then disguise it as a pizza box.

What you can do with a pen...

This is art drawn freehand with a Bic pen.