Small things 4 Feb

• George Santos went to a Starbucks and caused a huge lineup. Yeah, he couldn’t decide which name to give them.
• The already positive Covid rapid test. Or as some people call it, the weekend extender device.
• Guess why dark is spelled with a ‘k’, instead of a ‘c’? You can’t ‘c’ in the dark.
• Live dangerously. Tell an avid hiker that living life to the fullest doesn’t have to include hiking.
• Remember the song from 40 years ago, ‘We’re not gonna take it”? Turns out, we continue to take it.
• When the box indicates that the microwave instructions are based on a 1000 watt oven. Who are they kidding? Nobody knows the wattage of their microwave. 
• Can we go back to putting gargoyles on buildings again?
• When you’re a kid, you don’t realize that you’re also watching your parents grow up.
• “Let me merge, or I swear I’ll kill us both.” I love how that could apply both to driving and Excel.
• I’m an anti-faxer. I will gladly march on the capitol to demonstrate against fax mandates.
• “Nobody in China ever says ‘Are you in the mood for Chinese?’” ~Jerry Seinfeld
• Should black olives be called Greece's pieces?
• “Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.”—George Carlin

Me as a kid: [Falls 10 feet from the monkey bars] “I'M OK!”
Me now: “I tried to scoop ice cream that was just a little too frozen and dislocated my shoulder.”