Friday, February 17, 2023

Small things 17 Feb

  • I saw a spy balloon while driving my car! Then I realized it was just bird poop on my windshield.
  • Start a peanut butter company named Gif, wait for the inevitable lawsuit, let a court of law decide the pronunciation once and for all.
  • Never make snow angels in the dog park.
  • Has anyone ever tried cutting a grilled cheese sandwich other than diagonally?
  • Find someone who cares about you as much as GMail cares about new devices signing into your account.
  • How to give a Canadian an aneurism: Just scream at them, “Stop saying sorry!”
  • [Every muscle, tendon, bone and ligament in my body aches as I stand up] “Yes, I would like to ‘party’.
  • Air vents in action movies are spotless. Have the air vent cleaning companies been lying to us this whole time?
  • I don’t understand the existence of triple cheese Kraft Dinner. ALL Kraft Dinner should be triple cheese.
  • For fun I went into realtor.ca and plugged in $2,000,000 - $5,000,000 as my price range. Damned website said “Please choose a price range you can afford.” j/k
  • What do you mean there are people who live out of their suitcase on vacation and don’t put the clothes in the drawers and closet?
  • Oh you think lockdowns during Covid were inconvenient? Just imagine your life during the prohibition era. It lasted 13 years.


No comments: