Small things 28 Oct

• Trump keeps saying he wants to see Biden in prison, but I don't think Biden will have time to visit him there.
• Stormtroopers are notoriously bad shots. Does that also mean they take shitty photos?
• Dear alarm clock manufacturers: Make double-tapping the snooze reset the alarm for the same time tomorrow. Then make it possible to program the alarm to only fire on specific days of the week. The double-tap would advance the reset to the next scheduled day. That is all.
• When the tab breaks off the top of the soda can trying to open it.
• The fun I could have as a traffic cop saying, “Do you know why I pulled you over today?”
• What’s the difference between a kleptomaniac and a literalist? The literalist takes things literally. The kleptomaniac takes things, literally.
• The word ‘gullible’ isn’t in the dictionary.
• Is it crazy how saying sentences backwards… creates backwards sentences saying how crazy it is.
• “Run out of makeup?” [4 words to ruin a 1st date]