Small things 22 April

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  I turned on a classroom computer at work only to discover that someone had tried entering a password and failed. The next morning, it happened again, but they only entered 4 characters before giving up. I checked the security logs and it happened at the exact same time as the Covid cleaner comes through and cleans the door and wall touch surfaces. That's right, he had been wiping the computer keyboards too.
• Being a parent of a toddler is hard. You spend 90% of your time stopping them from accidentally killing themselves, and 10% calming them down because they don't understand why you've stopped them from accidentally killing themselves.
• Veterinarian: "About your cat Mr. Schrodinger. I have good news and bad news..."
• Whenever we're having grilled cheese sandwiches, I ask if I can cut the cheese. But not because I want to slice the cheddar.
• Don't let anyone treat you like luncheon meat. You are charcuterie.
• I'm investing in stocks now. Chicken. Beef. Vegetable. I'll be a bouillonaire.
• Why do dryers have a 'less dry' setting?