Small things 6 August

• Dasani is Italian for "Coke just sold you water."
• Dear fossil fuel industry: The Stone Age didn't end because we ran out of stones.
  
  
  
• Kids eat 168 more calories from snacks daily today than kids in 1977. But those 1977 kids weighed the same, what with all that hair.
• Forgotten party rule: If you're going to host some festivities at your house, at least invite the neighbours. That way, they might not get any sleep, but at least they can join in the festivities and have a decent reason to stay up.
• Yeah, but do you want YouTube Premium? No? Yeah, but do you want YouTube Premium?
• Remember when your mom would say, "I'm gonna go lay down."? I bet you totally get it now, huh?
• Instead of naming roads after leaders or celebrities, let's name them after the contractor who built it. Who knows, the quality of roads might improve.
• I am gruntled.
• Your brain is responsible for keeping you alive, not keeping you happy. You have to be intentional about bringing joy into your life.
• Whenever your spouse does something you don't like, try saying, "I'll be making a note on your performance evaluation."