[This week on House Hunters]
Realtor: "So what's your budget?"
Wife: "Well, my husband and I each just got our $600 stimulus check, so...
Husband: "$1.2 million?"
[Library visit]
Visitor: Do you have a book about Pavlov's dog?
Librarian: It rings a bell...
Visitor: How about a book about Schrodinger's cat?
Librarian: We might have it. And we might not.
- The door to the maternity ward says Push. Push! PUSH!!
- It turns out that the kids in Africa didn't care whether I finished all my supper when I was a kid.
- I have purposely switched my car's infotainment to the radio just so that anyone working on my car can't listen to my personal music.
- The car's weakest part is the nut holding the steering wheel.
- Spiders are the only web designers that like to find bugs.
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