Small things 2 Oct

• The CDC says over 76,000 Americans will die from obesity in a year. Yet, there's probably still gonna be a new flavour of Doritos coming out any time.
• Oreos are the KFC of cookies. They're out of control. KFC lost it when they made a sandwich using fried chicken pieces instead of bread. Oreo's tumble into the abyss was more gradual and took decades. They started as a single cracker. Then a sandwich with creme filling. They even tried lemon filling in the 1920s. Why? Double-stuf came next (1974). That was necessary. At one point, size was the issue and a Big Stuf giant 250 calorie Oreo was made. They even tried different flavours for the filling, including peanut butter, mint, and birthday cake. Then they covered the cookie in fudge coating. I guess the chocolate cookies weren't chocolate enough. Then they gave up on chocolate and tried white cookies, Golden Oreos (2004). Sorry, that's not an Oreo. Then they went the other way on size and made Oreo Minis. The see-saw tilted again and we got Mega Stuf Oreos, because Double Stuf wasn't stuffed enough. See saw goes the other way and we get Oreo Thins. Are we done yet? Nope. How about chocolate cookie AND chocolate filling? Don't they already have a cookie like that called a FudgeeO? I digress. Last but not least (definitely not least) is the 2019 gem, The Most Stuf, with 4x the creme of a standard Oreo, because diabetes I guess. By the way, none of this includes the 27 limited edition varieties that came out at one time or another. Madness.
  
  
  
• Do you ever get the feeling that 2020 started when Pandora posted an unboxing video on YouTube?
• Someone told me that potato chips are meant to be bitten into, not placed whole into your mouth. I believe they are sadly mistaken.
• I wonder if anyone has ever been served a DQ Blizzard and the server NOT turned it upside down like they normally do.
• Any government that prevents its prisoners from voting has a great incentive to arrest its dissenters.

Q. "What are you going to be for Halloween?"

A. "As fast as I can."