Small things 16 Oct

• The reverse surprise party: When you invite everyone over for dinner and right in the middle you say, "This is not a regular dinner. Surprise, it's my birthday!" And when everyone looks panicked because they don't have presents, you tell them that you bought and wrapped enough presents for everyone to give you.
• There are people who probably think their special talent is attracting campfire smoke no matter where they sit.
• His name is Ptoughneigh. It's pronounced Tony. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the English language.
  
  
  
• Sneezing with a face mask on is akin to peeing a little in your pants. But with your face.
• Autumn dog poop. You know it's out there. But with all the leaves on the ground, you just don't know where.
• Back in the day, before cellular phones, homes only had one phone line. You couldn't call anyone, nor could they call you if someone else in the house was already using the line.
• Organize and store electronics cables by folding them into an empty toilet paper roll tube with the ends facing you
• You can now buy a ‘Half Christmas Tree’ if you hate decorating the back and want to save space.
• It really doesn't matter what others think of you. It only matters what you think of yourself. Live your life such that you can look at yourself in the mirror and be proud of what you've done. Also, "likes" from social media don't mean a thing.
• When someone says you can't do something in life, it means they can't do it, not that you can't.
• Don't call it traditional marriage if it doesn't secure alliances between rival fiefdoms.