Small things 5 June

• 
  Best Stephen Colbert quote heard this week: "I didn't poop my pants. I just ran diagnostics on my boxers to see if they are load-bearing. They are."
• When you wait for the waiter, you become a waiter......
• If you own a Tesla and it gets stolen, is it now an Edison?
• Achy? Tired? Headache? Foggy brain? You may not have COVID. You may have been drinking decaf.
• The best way to introduce yourself at a party is NOT "I want you to know that I personally have no problem with you being here...."
• Bars are going to want their patrons to drink 2-3 times as much to make up for the limited capacity due to social distancing. Amateurs need not apply.
• We live in an era of woke capitalism in which companies pretend to care about social justice to sell products to people who pretend to hate capitalism.
• Better to be 6 feet apart than 6 feet under....