Wednesday, January 12, 2011

It's a status thing

I'm convinced that Starbucks customers aren't really there for the coffee. It's more of a social experience, which is why Starbucks typically don't have drive-thrus. You have to go in. You need to order something exotic, or something unique to stand out from the crowd. Bonus points if you brought your iPad or Macbook Air, are wearing a fashionable scarf and can fake an accent. You must learn the lingo in order to fit in as a Starbucks regular. "I'll have a Venti Double Peppermint Skinny Extra-Dry 170 Dirty Chai." Have you ever told a Starbucks customer that you never go to Starbucks and don't understand why anyone would? The look you get is priceless.

Starbucks customers may not openly admit this, but the store could sell petrified scented skunk jerky instead, people would still line up for the stuff as long as there was a secret lingo to master and there was status involved. "Yeah, I'll have a Backyard Dipped Extra-Hot Lean Garlic Skunk Jerky please....... with extra salt."

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

My brother-in-law is totally addicted to Starbucks and they should have a drive through just for him. I'm just sayin'. R