Saturday, August 22, 2009

Just when you thought it safe to eat fast food

So here's what I imagine went down at KFC headquarters lately:

KFC staffer 1: Well you know folks, the public is slowly getting on a health kick, so it behoves us to start making some healthy food.
KFC staffer 2: I don't know. If everyone is moving toward healthier food, that leaves this huge vacuum on the unhealthy end of the spectrum.
KFC staffer 3: Exactly! We don't need to get on the health train, what we need to do is cement our position on heart-attack ridge.
KFC staffer 1: What do you propose we do?
KFC staffer 3: Let's make something that flips the bird at the health-conscious. A real doozer.
KFC staffer 2: Like what?
KFC staffer 3: What are we known for?
KFC staffer 1: Chicken.
KFC staffer 3: Exactly. Are we known for bread? No. So I say we make a sandwich out of chicken.
KFC staffer 2: We already do that.
KFC staffer 3: Nah, you don't get it. No bread. Chicken with chicken and cheese and bacon in the middle.
KFC staffer 1: No bread..... ?
KFC staffer 3: Screw the bread!
KFC staffer 1: That's pretty extreme. What do we call it?
KFC staffer 2: The KFC Double Down sandwich. Or as we'll call it internally - the Double-your-chances-at-a-stroke.
KFC staffer 1: I think we're done here. Good work people.


Anonymous said...

Yummy!!! Available in Canada?

Karl Plesz said...

Considering the last time I was in a KFC, I am not even remotely qualified to answer that.

Jonathan said...

Wow, I want one. The only way to improve on that would be to make a dipping sauce by blending up some KFC chicken skin with some cheez whiz and ranch dressing.