Banks simplified

I need a safe place to put my money.

Banks: Give it to us.

OK. You'll look after it?

Banks: Yes.

Can we earn interest on it?

Banks: A little.

Will you be earning interest on it?

Banks: Oh yeah. A lot.

I can use your services for free then.

Banks: No way. We charge a fee.

But you already make money from my money.

Banks: Yes, but it's not enough.

Why not?

Banks: Because we have to pay our shareholders.

What's that?

Banks: The people who invested in us. They earn the most from all the money.

OK. Can I be a shareholder?

Banks: No. Only rich people can afford our shares.

So, let me get this straight. I give you my money and the people who need the interest the least get the most of it.

Banks: Correct. Would you like to borrow some money? We have lots.

Can anyone get this money?

Banks: Uh no. You have to prove to us that you don't really need it.

Is that free?

Banks: Hell no. Borrowing some of the money is the most expensive thing. Unless....

Unless you're already rich.

Banks: Precisely.