Small things 23 Aug

• Fossil fuels are made from dead dinosaurs and plastic is made from fossil fuels, ergo plastic dinosaurs are made from dead dinosaurs.
• When the Clinton, Trump and British Royal Family assassins all ran into each other at Jeffery Epstein's prison cell. That must have been awkward, yah?
• When the security question on the web site asks "What's the name of your favourite pet?", your pets watch to see what you answer. Oh yes, they do.....
• Bottled water companies don't produce water. They produce plastic bottles.
• Things you can't say to grandma: "I'm not hungry."
• Next time you're in the meat department, grab a steak, 'accidentally' drop it on the floor and say "Whoops, now it's ground beef!"
• Computers were once a huge scientific breakthrough. Now we use them to look at cats.
• Lasers were once a huge scientific breakthrough. Now we use them to play with cats.