Oh my stomach.... it hurts...

Somebody get me a paper bag before I hyperventilate with laughter.



Songs represented by charts and graphs....... Oh yes!

Tee hee....

Does anybody in Eastern Canada have any snow they can spare? We're a little short of it here in Calgary.

OK...... OK....... I know...... I'm being mean now.

I'm just seeing if I can get a rise out of my sister......

RPM edition 4

Here's an easy one.

Q.: This British band's first North American hit was about a French hooker.

Grand Guignol is gone... but it'll be back

The run of An Evening at the Grand Guignol at Loose Moose is over. You may recall that I tried my best to only 'hint' at how the show ended by mentioning a dance number. But now that it's over I can tell you - they did the Thriller dance number! It was awesome. And now I have the picture to prove it (thanks Sandy..... who gave me the picture and err.... Rob who took it).

[singing]
You know it's thriller, thriller night
You're fighting for your life inside of killer, thriller tonight

"Kinda like a garage sale, except they're selling robots"

Kids are absolutely precious.

Listen to this adorable 3 year old give her take on Star Wars (episode 4).

An excerpt:

"Obi Kenobi is kind of a teacher. He's teaching Luke how to... learn how to do his little light-up sword. He has to try to block the little pokey ball. He tried to do it without seeing."

Should I feed the machine.... or help break it?

It just occurs to me now that pretty much the only reason I go to the mall anymore (besides getting Darlene there and back) is to try stuff on/out before going home and buying it on eBay.

You can't blame me really. You can easily save 50% on items you buy on eBay, so why would you want to purposely pay twice as much? Yes, I know the business model of the modern retail enterprise depends on our purchases, but that model seems to have lost its lustre. Although one could argue that the prices being charged in stores are necessary to feed the retail machine, the people who make the machine run (in the stores) certainly aren't getting rich in the process - far from it. But the mall owners and retail company CEOs are. So am I cheating? By shopping in a mall, am I doing the retail sales folks any favours by feeding a machine that doles out minimum wage in a society that makes living on that salary impossible? I really don't know the answers to those questions.

But I do know that if I can get the same $190 pair of Ray Ban sunglasses (from the mall) on eBay for $95 (shipped), then they are probably worth $50 wholesale and kudos to the people who make it available to me for less. I wonder how much longer this model will last before more and more people realize there are better deals to be had online.

Best wall thread read on another Facebook profile...

... this week:

"Was it natural causes or ninja related?"

"when you are a ninja, everything is ninja related."

Used totally without permission.

Been a long time coming.....

I think it's been 20 years since the Montreal Canadiens sat atop the standings in the conference.

Guy Carbonneau was a hero of mine when he played for the Habs and he's a hero again now that he's coaching the team.

Go Habs Go!

"This is physically the same way heroin works"

People who really like Coke probably will not want to read this article.........

It details what happens to your body within one hour of drinking a Coke.

Nasty.

Compressed air car revisited

In June of last year, I posted about an incredible car that is powered by compressed air. The link I had at the time no longer leads to this incredible invention, so I thought it was time to update the links and the news on the invention.

It's closer to reality than you might think......

The best part? Once compressed air is available at the pumps, you could recharge your car in 3 minutes - or plug the car in so the on-board compressor can recharge the air tanks in 4 hours, using $2 worth of electricity. For a range of 200km (124 miles). That's what they've accomplished... so far. It could get much better.

The future is nano-tech

Want a peek at the future? Nokia has a vision whereby the personal device of the future will morph into the shape of different functional devices thanks to nanotechnology.

Among the abilities they envision: nanowire 'grass' on the surface of the device capable of converting the sun's energy into electricity at an efficiency likely only dreamed of today. Interesting stuff.

Video here. Nokia Morph concept site here.

Seemingly defying the laws of physics

Here's a trick that could impress your friends.

It's really not that amazing once you realize why it works, but it's visually impressive nonetheless.

RPM edition 3

Alright music trivia fans, you seem to be chomping at the bit, so here's another.

Q.: This female artist moans a five word phrase 28 times during the length of her first hit. Name the artist. If you can, name the hit.

I'd post a picture, but even a glimpse would be a dead give-away.......

Oh my! This should be very cool

In a year's time, there will be such a thing online called the world wide telescope. I could not describe it and do it justice.

You have to hear / see it for yourself.

[Update - Dec 2008] It's online now. It requires a download.

Appropo

The Billboard Liberation Front did a funny with an AT&T billboard and posted the transformation on YouTube.

In case the text isn't legible, it says "AT&T works in more places, like NSA Headquarters".

Is this how loyalty is repaid?

Am I the only person who thinks these points systems redeemable for flights are the biggest scam ever? This past week, I needed to set up a flight back east and decided to try and redeem some earned points.

I started with Aeroplan (Aeroplan is the points collection mechanism for Air Canada - for you non Canuckians). As far as their web site indicated, I indeed had enough points to fly to my destination and back, but when I applied to redeem them, there weren't any remaining flights to be had for that many points, only flights that needed 50% more - minimum! Worse, these higher point cost flights were not direct - oh no. In some cases, I would have visited 5 airports on my journey. So much for that.

Next, I was about to try Air Miles. Darlene told me about the hoops she has to jump through to book a flight through Air Miles and I freaked. She said be prepared to be on the phone (waiting included) for about 2 hours, maybe more. That's right - you can only redeem Air Miles by phone, which of course puts pressure on me to accept whatever crap flights they toss my way. The more I thought about the effort involved, the more depressed I got. Especially considering that Air Miles flights aren't exactly free - you still have to pay the fees and taxes, often in the order of several hundred dollars.

None of this really seems like a good deal to me. I try to be objective, reminding myself - you are getting the offer of flights for free. But to me it's like being promised a prime steak and getting a cheap hamburger.

RPM edition 2

Since the first trivia question went so quickly, I thought I'd get another one out there right away.

Q.: What gender bender wanted to release an album sporting women's panties?

Answers in the comments please. Good luck.

Never a dull moment

A good friend at work tipped me off on a site that could potentially provide hours of entertainment. It's a blog that captures the best of Bozeman Montana police reports. A sampling:

A woman said a motorist tried to run her over at a crosswalk on North Rouse Avenue, though she told police that she didn’t think the driver really would have done it. The man, for his part, had revved his engine at the woman to tease her and didn’t know he’d frightened her. He apologized.

A deputy responded to a report of a naked person lying on the interstate near Manhattan. The deputy discovered that it was not a person. It was a blowup doll.

A woman on Bridger Drive intentionally walked over her boyfriend's new couch with muddy feet. She was cited for criminal mischief.

To the good people of Bozeman: We're not laughing at you..... we're laughing with you.

Music trivia from the RPM edition

Which of David Bowie's characters does he describe as a junkie?

Place your answers in the comments.

Good luck.

Thumbs down on rebate cancellation

I just had a quick look at the Federal budget the Conservatives introduced today. The rebate for buyers of fuel-efficient vehicles is cancelled.

BOOO!

I identify with the one on the right

This lolcats picture made me laugh too, even though it does not include any cats.....

$5 per month for all the music you want

I could have sworn I blogged about this before, but couldn't find a quick reference to it. But anyway, one of the suggestions put forward by some people in hopes of re-defining the online music model is to charge all high speed internet customers a surcharge on their internet connection fee (let's say $5). This would entitle you to download all the music you could ever want - legally. The surcharge would be collected by a music industry organization responsible for divvying out the collected fees to artists based on the number of times their stuff was downloaded / traded.

It's an idea I like very much and it seems to have attracted the attention of the Songwriters Association of Canada.

Thanks to Ernest for the tip about the article.

Unfortunately, there are a few people who don't think this is a fair way to collect fees, as it 'punishes' those who don't download music at all. While I understand their argument, you could say that you don't want to pay for the bandwidth other internet users are using for peer-to-peer file sharing or downloading (even legal) video - but you are.

If the surcharge idea won't wash, I have a different idea - advertising. I don't think it's out of the realm of possibility to make music available for free from sites that push advertising on you when you choose to download.

...and we're farther north!

This is a comparative study of snow..... in Canada.... in February.


On the left, my sister's place in Aylmer Quebec - taken today. The snow banks are just as tall as I remember them when I was a kid. That's my niece Jessica being dwarfed by the snow bank on one side of their driveway.

On the right, that's the view outside my front yard - taken this morning. As you can see, the snow bank is about as tall as a small dog.

Stupid... ankles

So, for the umpteenth time (I've lost count), I injured my ankle. I was at work Friday and I guess I somehow caught the edge of a raised floor tile (I spend most of my work days in a large computer lab) and tripped, lost my balance momentarily and managed to turn my ankle sideways, placing my entire weight on it. For a second, it produced a pain that I just cannot describe. It was funny to watch everyone's reaction, because they likely only saw the look on my face, but had no idea why I looked like that, having incurred the injury below their line of sight.

Anyway, I tried to minimize the damage once I got home by icing it, but of course it swelled like a little balloon and now is turning a nice shade of purple. I don't know what it is about my ankles - I've turned them like this many times. All I can say is...... it's annoying. This is the main reason why I don't skate.

The hilarity continues

Not content to sue their customers directly (it's a public relations nightmare), or bribe universities into policing their networks for copyright infringement (easily defeated), the recording industry now feels the only way to stop the copying of music online is to convince lawmakers to force internet service providers (ISPs) to monitor all the traffic that passes through them looking for copyright material. As this intelligent article suggests:

"An analogy may help to illustrate the point. Millions of people use the telephone network for questionable, illegal or unethical purposes. But we would regard it as unthinkable to impose on phone companies a legal obligation to monitor every conversation."

What Liverpool bus terminal is a Beatles song title?

I have such great friends.

Last year I mentioned that I was looking for the RPM edition of Trivial Pursuit. It's a version of the game that contains only music trivia and it was made in the 1980's. I have played the game but never owned it, having not been able to find it in stores or anywhere for that matter..... until now. My good friend David, who obviously never forgot that I was looking for the game, spotted it at a flea market for $5 and just brought it to me yesterday.

Thanks David. To my friends, family members and work colleagues who I will now mercilessly taunt with music trivia......... now you know who to blame.

The answer to the question posed in the title is.... in the comments.......

Speaking of the Emperor from Star Wars.....

Here's a funny skit depicting the Emperor trying to land a job.

Not all LOLcats have cats in them

Like this one for example, which had me laughing for a long time.

Of course, it helped when the person that showed it to me did his impression of the Emperor from Star Wars Episode IV.

Ban 'opt out' business solicitations

I got a phone call from my cell phone provider today. Because I'm such a good customer [grin], they wanted to offer me a special package for free for one month. This package would contain the services I already have, in addition..... and that's when I blacked out. So when I was asked if I wanted to accept that special offer, I only had one question. What happens at the end of the month? Well, I go on using these new services as per normal. Ah, yes, but what happens to my account charges? This is where the salesperson started with the avoidance measures. There was talk of 'savings' and 'less than what you pay now', but those were slight untruths. They almost had me accepting the offer until I heard the words fourteen dollars. I said hold on a second, fourteen dollars - I could have sworn you said my account fee would not go up?

Anyway - long story short, they were playing the old 'opt out' trick on me - offer the customer some free extras and force THEM to opt out by month end in order not to get charged more money. I said, I am not interested in any offer that forces me to do something at the end of the trial if I don't want those extras. The sales person got very aggressive and insisted that it was in my best interest to accept. I made it clear that the only offer I'd be interested in was one that required me to 'opt in' if I wanted to pay for the extra services once the promotion was over, not one that required me to 'opt out'. We talked in circles for another minute, then I said to just drop the offer.

Then I called customer service and complained that I wasn't happy with their new 'opt out' tactic. I made it clear that if they tried that trick again, I will be switching providers. Isn't the 'opt out' tactic outlawed somewhere? If not, it should be. I won't drag the name of the provider into the mud, but if you're from Canada, the picture should clue you in as to who it was. But I'm guessing they're not the only ones who pull this stunt.....

'See' what's in your food....

Most foods have nutritional data on the label now, but can you actually gauge what all the numbers mean? Maybe something more visual is more meaningful. Foodsel does that for you, breaking out the content of the food - protein, fats, ash, water, carbs. Clicking the other categories also lets you see the minerals and vitamins. But even more fun is the visuals tab, which shows the energy, sugar and fat content as a visual representation. If you start feeling guilty, you can click on the exercises tab and see how long you have to work off the food given a variety of activities.

Big Mac? About an hour of jogging to work it off.