Why do I get the feeling this town could only exist in Cali?

If someone told you they lived on Zzyzx Road in Zzyzx, Califormia, you'd probably think they were putting you on, right?

Wrong! Don't take my word for it...... go find it on Google Maps. It's on the way to Vegas from LA.

Are you feeling secure yet?

This is too funny, yet it wrote itself.

The Transportation Security Administration has lost a computer hard drive containing Social Security numbers, bank data and payroll information for about 100,000 employees.

Starbucks nicknames..... the list begins

I've been overhearing a few nicknames for the Starbucks chain lately and I thought to myself, "Self...." I said, "I wonder if there's a web page listing nicknames for Starbucks". I was shocked and dismayed to find none. So I'm starting one.

• Fivebucks (coined by Jerry Seinfeld)
• Stirbucks
• Yuppiebucks
• Starsmucks
• Buckies
• Coffeessofreakinhotyoucantdrinkittillnext4thofjulybucks (junebee)
• Theyallreadyhaveenoughmoneythankyouverymuch (Carla)
  

Feel free to email me at kplesz [who has an account with] hotmail, or comment and I'll add it to the list with credits (if you tell me who you are).
Picture by *mars

100 things in 100 days - number 45

45. I can't swim. But I love the sound of the surf.

That's right, I never did learn to swim. In fact, I have an ingrained fear of the water. You'll not catch me in the deep end of a pool without a flotation device and even with that I'm nervous. I don't mind being in water, but I prefer my head above it and go out of my way to ensure it.

Now flip the coin - I love the sound of the surf. Or a flowing stream. Or a waterfall. So I have no problem with the sound of water, I just seem to have an issue with going under. I have no explanation for the fear, perhaps I drowned in a past life.........

Passionate about science

I like science. But even more so, I like anyone that can talk about science without making your eyes roll into the back of their sockets - if you catch my drift.

Which is why I was glad to discover a man named Neil deGrasse Tyson. He makes science interesting. Check out his speeches.

Episode 20 of Great White North II is up

In this episode, the hosers decide to have a little fun with a typical American stereotype of Canada - that we're this country that always has snow year round. Video.ca link .

It was actually filmed in early spring, while we still had some of the white stuff around.

Where is it? Edition 21

No zoom in picture this time.

Name the city.

Hurry.... before Jim figures it out again..

[update] Hello? Where have all the geo-philes gone?

I can't keep it a secret any longer......

I've been keeping a secret from my loyal readers and it's driving me crazy. I didn't want to say anything so as not to jinx the outcome, but I just can't stand it anymore.

If you've been reading this blog a while, you already know about our creative offerings (starring Bernie May and yours truly), Great White North II. You also know that the original hosers, played by Dave Thomas and Rick Moranis, were to be reprising their roles in the upcoming 24 anniversary of Strange Brew special.

What you didn't know is that the producers of the show saw our videos on the internet and wanted to hear our story. Long story short - the original hosers themselves screened select episodes and a few seconds of one 'may' end up on the program as an example of fan videos. At this point, the chances are quite low that our material will air, because as the producers explained to me, they have way too much stuff already to possibly fit into an hour-long show as it is.

But I was thrilled just to be discovered by these folks, ecstatic that we'll get to see the hose-heads on TV again, even for a short time. So, if you do happen to watch the show on the upcoming long weekend (CBC, 20 May at 9pm - check local listings), watch for us - you never know...... Of course I will keep you informed of any developments.

[update] It's official - we are not in the show. There was just too much material to fit us in. Oh well.

100 things in 100 days - number 46

46. I discovered women at the age of 14 at Seaside Heights NJ. One of These Nights by The Eagles was playing on the boardwalk PA.

I don't know how it is / was for other young 'uns, but it's like one minute you're not really noticing the opposite sex and the next minute - you are. For me, that minute happened on the boardwalk at Seaside Heights, New Jersey, summer 1975. I was seated on a bench, the sun was setting, it was warm, there was a light breeze. The boardwalk was filled with the kinds of amusements you'd see at any fairground (for those of you that have never taken in an Atlantic coast boardwalk). The joint had music playing over loudspeakers throughout the place and the song was One of These Nights. Then I noticed them. The women. The song was completely apropos.

Great food with an ambience to match

Last night, Darlene and I went for dinner with friends to a lovely Calgary restaurant named Saltlik. We had already had lunch at the Saltlik in Banff, but we had yet to sample from their dinner menu. Darlene and I shared the French Onion Soup for starters. It was the tastiest and most inventive broth I've had since the Old House in Courtney, BC (IMHO, the best and most creative French Onion soup - period). Then we moved on to the Grand Filet with Bearnaise Sauce and on a hunch, we both substituted their default Stuffed Baker for an order of Scalloped Potatoes (for an extra charge). It was a good hunch. The food was fantastic. The atmosphere was awesome, great music and they have a cozy party room with fireplace and pool table in the basement that is booked many months in advance. Saltlik is downtown on the corner of Centre and 8th Ave. (Stephen Avenue Mall), but there is lots of parking nearby at the Telus Convention Centre underground parkade.

It won't be long now.....

You may recall me telling you about the upcoming Bob & Doug special due on TV some time this year. Well, it turns out that their goal of broadcasting on the May 'two-four' long weekend is coming to fruition. I just saw the first ad on CBC for the special. It caught me off guard, so I don't have a date and time for you yet. I'm pumped.

All together now hosers......... Coo-Roo-Coo-Coo-Coo-Coo-Coo-Coo!!

Watch this space. I'll keep you informed as soon as I know more details.

eBay comedy

Some of the funniest eBay feedback you'll ever read. Samples:

Next time don't write CONTAINS PORN in big red letters all over the box! sheesh!

CONFUSED— the ouija board says I should poison my wife, the 8-BALL says to wait.

A+however, in future when you list KIDNEY, make sure you specify as HUMAN kidney

The so-called 'skin tag removal kit' was just a pair of nail clippers & a Q-tip!

WHOA! A+STINKY CHEESE! Just opened the box and it left a stain on my ceiling!


Warning - many comments may offend..........

Free Intel sticker

I am totally digging this witty site advising when it's time to buy a new computer. Funny stuff. Excerpt:

In fact, if you look on the motherboard of a several year old PC, you'll actually see signs of ageing.

It goes on to recommend some pretty decent hardware......... [snort]

100 things in 100 days - number 47

47. Coke over Pepsi anyday.

Pepsi Cola - tastes too sweet, no character, no bite, did I mention too sweet?
Coca Cola - a nice taste with a bit of a zing to it. A pizza or burger / fries meal is incomplete without a good ol' Coke.

It's the real thing.........

Picture by funkyah

See what you're made of....

People keep asking us if we got to see any shows while we were in Vegas last week. We didn't - not because we didn't want to, but because there wasn't much going on during our stay. There's much more going on between Thursday and Sunday than between Monday and Thursday. But I did manage to find out that Bodies: The Exhibition was on at the Tropicana. Darlene said we were so going there. Who am I to argue?

Bodies: The Exhibition was pretty wild. I'd like to personally thank the person who invented the process so we could see what the parts of the body really look like. Didn't realize how much junk gets absorbed by the lungs, even in a non-smoker. I won't even bother telling you what the smoker's lung looked like..... Another part I found fascinating was a body (form) where they found a way to show only the veins, arteries and blood vessels in the whole body. It looked so cool.

Anyway, if you don't think you'd be weirded out by seeing actual preserved body parts up close, be sure to check out this exhibition if you get a chance.

"Remember, no matter where you go, there you are."

If you're a fan of sci-fi camp, the be sure to record or watch The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension this Saturday night at 7pm (Mountain - check your listings for local times) on the Space channel (Canada).

It colours everything

Are you big into colour? If so, then you might enjoy losing yourself a while in the Colour Lovers Blog. Watch for the article 11 Great Colour Legends.

It's very colourful..............

Cat macros

Do you know what the term lolcats means?

Let me fix that for you.............. Oh - and there are whole blogs dedicated to 'em. One blog and another.

You're welcome.

[update] Now... this is likely to motivate you to may be make your own lolcat. Before you do, you need to learn LOL-Kitteh as a Second Language (LKSL-101) in Five Easy Steps.

Errr........ I mean.... OMG!1! Yuz needz 2 lernz dat lengwidg ... s'ownlee taeks feiv schteps kthks!

100 things in 100 days - number 48

48. I believe people wear too much perfume.

Where do I start!? Holy crap people! Let me just do a huge public service to the whole world right now. You need a light dab of scent on maybe two places on your whole body to give off a pleasant odour that others can detect. You do not need to marinate in the stuff. I'm serious. In fact, the more perfume you wear, the more you'll think you need, because you get so accustomed to it that you keep thinking you need more. You don't. You know what? I think people who do wear perfume should make friends with people who do not and use them as a judge of whether they're wearing enough. Because chances are, if you ask "Am I wearing enough?", the answer will be "Yes", no matter how sparingly you think you've applied it.

At work, there are some folks who walk by my cubicle space and it just hits you like a brick wall........ and lingers for 30 minutes. It's bad.

Quit it!

(Can you tell this is one of my biggest pet peeves?)

Don'tcha wish your suit pants were lost like mine? Don'tcha?

$67 million. That's what you should be able to sue a dry cleaner for if they lose your favourite suit pants. The individual launching the suit? A judge.

Yep. Don't take my word for it.........

P.S.: Like my Pussycat Dolls-esque title?

Cherenkov effect.....

Here's a book that might make an interesting addition to a coffee table: An American Index of the Hidden and Unfamiliar. A study of spaces usually off-limits to the public, over the course of four years, Taryn Simon cajoled her way into dozens of obscure restricted sites and documented them with pictures and words. A sample can be seen here.

The picture is of a specific type of nuclear waste in a pool of heavy water. The scary thing is - I've seen this eerie blue glow in another facility I cajoled my way into many years ago. It's spooky to see that with your own eyes.

When will they ever learn?

All censoring does is make the material more popular than it ever would have been. This is true of movies, music, writing and now - technology hacks. Thanks to pressure from the creators of the DRM scheme for HD DVDs, instead of eliminating the hack that cracks this DRM, folks are now motivated to publish the code wherever they can.

What's the big deal? Well, the industry doesn't feel you have the right to make backup copies of the new Blu-Ray and HD-DVD formats, so they've gone out of their way to protect the material. How did that work for ya?

[update] Cafe Press is already (naturally) selling t-shirts with the hex code hack. Yesterday, over 36,000 web pages were publishing the code. May 7th that number rose to over 1,800,000.....

Map of communities on the intertubes

I am loving this witty online community map, drawn like an old parchment map.

The more familiar you are with online life, the funnier the joke will be.

Sea of Memes................. [snort]

100 things in 100 days - number 49

49. I like cats.

I tolerate dogs, but I love cats. It's hard to explain why, but I guess I admire their aloofness one moment, which can instantly be replaced by warmness. Cats can be goofy like dogs too. I remember our cats, before we had to adopt them out because of allergies. Our male (Taz) loved to play fetch, or poke the ball off your lap from underneath. It was fun to watch his vocalizations when he saw creatures outside too (birds, rabbits, squirrels, gophers). The girl (Ash) was a riot too. She was so dainty and always fluttered her eyelids at you. She also loved to taunt Taz and egg him on to chase her.

Yeah.......... good times. So if you have cats, we'll be right over...... well, you know.... for a little while.

Buffalo

Don't read this wikipedia entry while under the influence of any kind of mind altering substance.

Next time............. ask me first!

I discovered that I have recently been the victim of credit card fraud. Some unsavoury (that's my word for the day) person charged a flight to my credit card. Bastard didn't even have the decency to ask if I wanted to go too.......

I feel so............................. violated.

Pardon me...... can you spare a clean toilet?

I was watching the local news, which was telling the story of the lack of available public washrooms in the downtown core (of Calgary). This is of some interest to me, as I can somewhat identify with it. For example, while I was attending acting classes at the Epcor Centre, there were a few times that I could not find an accessible public washroom. The Telus Convention Centre, where I parked my car, had no accessible washrooms - they are blocked off except when events are in progress at the Convention Centre. When events are in progress, there are obvious signs beside the washroom entrances making it clear that they are only for the use of Convention participants. At the Epcor Centre, even with events occurring, all washrooms were locked.

So I watched the news story in order to see what the story was. They spoke about the city's plans to purchase high tech pay toilets. One city councillor spoke some truth when he said that part of the reason many washrooms were not accessible to the public was the presence of marginalized people - today's politically correct term for homeless people, etc. He mentioned their smell. I wonder how many city councillors have been close enough to a marginalized person to know what they smell like.

So, basically the reason there aren't enough public washrooms accessible to the masses is because tenants don't want marginalized folks to use them. Their words.......... not mine.

It's called Techno Tuesday......... how appropriate

Some folks might find this next online cartoon I stumbled upon a bit out there............

But one can't please everyone, can one?

100 things in 100 days - number 50 (halfway there)

50. I should have been an actor. I love an audience.

Oh yeah. Or a lead singer in a rock band. I can sing you know. At least I used to be able to at one time. I'll still kick ass in Karaoke. But back to acting. I never would have dreamed even giving acting a try 25 years ago. I was just too shy and lacking in self-confidence.

Fast-forward to today and I recently played the mother of a pirate princess (in drag) in a court room. Better late than never........ Don't worry, I have no illusions about beginning a career in acting, but while I'm learning and practising the craft, I'm sure having a ton of fun.

Just got my tickets in the mail....

I know it's not until July, but I'm excited anyway. I'm going to see the band Rush in concert.

Yay!!